Do we all live, to some extent, in a fantasy world we all DESPERATELY need to exist in order for sanity to succeed? I awake every morning, roll over and beg for two more seconds to exist in the reality of my dreams.... I reach for a pillow and hold it tight-knowing it's just a pillow but i simply create the illusion that quite possibly it could very well be him. Am i insane?!? I barely know him, but little does he know I've given him all of me... They're you go again Bobbi, Great Freakin Job. I realized tonight in my fantasy world that no other girls exist, but reality has a different angle to show me. I also realized tonight that i trust him- I trust him because i love him, and for that i believe i am truly full of foolish idiocy....
mmmmmmmmmmm... Banana Pancakes:)
I'm scared for that day to come when my fantasy world is no more. I'm scared for history to repeat itself and leave me stranded with nothing left to give. I'm terrified to wake up in the morning and not see his face, or reach for that god-forsaken pillow!
I pinch myself sometimes when i think of his smile... something that pure and blissful couldn't possibly be real... He makes pain seem impossible and all TOO real all wrapped up into one. He forces me out of my comfort zone, he infuriates me with looks and his attitude could test the patients of a saint, but i adore every inch of him all the same. Is it right to tremble at the thought of loosing someone you've only been with for three weeks?
Three weeks of heaven
Three weeks of bliss
Three weeks of pure happiness
Three weeks of unadulterated connection
I feel like screaming sometimes... Why would the universe hand you something this good only to not make it last? Do i believe in happy endings anymore? ya... that's what scares me... Will i be blinded by my adoration this time around, or will i finally get to stop waiting for something to fall through the roof of the ruins in which my story lies?
....Gently yet firm he grasps my face between his palms, You're Beautiful! Life Is Good!
